Winter's gone

The season changed suddenly and I am trying to find the words to express that lightness and calm that the warmth brings to my body, melting the tension in my shoulders and mind as it melts the last remaining piles of snow and ice from the shadows. The smells of the earth and the trees waking up and everything coming alive again makes the entire city invigorated and enthusiastic. People are smiling more, people are outside raking their lawns, playing on the sidewalks, congregating on porches as the evening light stays longer. We are all one in spirit in the great communal relief that winter has left for another 9 months.
And my heart is wandering from place to place looking for a solid place to land and yet rejoicing in the soft breeze that is keeping it aloft. Perhaps I will let it hover on the currents a while longer.

Spring reflections

Spring is coming and there was a warm, sweet breeze blowing across my face yesterday morning as I crossed the grey parking lot. I looked down at the puddles and marvelled at the stark reflections of the dark, bare tree branches against the pavement. I cursed not having my proper camera, but pulled out the old iphone and took a series of shots all over at all angles. One man stopped to watch and see what I was doing. He was amazed that I could find anything so beautiful on such a sullen day. But that is what I love to do best I think :-)
Part of me has turned upside down as well it seems. While I share most people's feelings of spring hope and anticipating the end of the winter, I am also moody, because I know that I am due for more change, and I am tired of negotiating with myself for it. I know what is in my heart and what isn't, and I am mad at myself for trying to justify it, waffling in the spring breeze and hoping I will suddenly wake up and everything will be different, that I will be content and sensible.
One puddle does not make a spring. There is so much beauty to see everywhere and in everyone, especially in the places where you least expect to find it. I can no more stop seeing it than I can stop breathing, and spring's light and warmth are making my eyes and heart restless for more.

Spring

Spring is lifting my heart. This winter felt a bit too bleak and cold for me. It had wonderful moments, but not enough to sustain my joy and hope. Now, the sun has started to shine when I wake and I spend a lot more time smiling. Things have not really changed, or maybe they have?
Either way, I am inspired and am back to feeling full of possibilities. Now I only need a slight change of scene and an amazing lingering kiss to start the season right.

The ants come marching in

It's Spring, and that means flowers, sunshine, and the return of all things creepy and crawly. I spent a couple of years in Florida, so I know about all kinds of bugs, disgusting bugs, bugs that show up in such great numbers that you wonder why they do not control the earth. I have lived with them, squished them, drowned them, bombed them, and accidentally swallowed them. I like bugs, outside. I am much less pleased with them in my house, and in particular, in my kitchen. Imagine my thrill when I walked into my kitchen two weekends ago and saw a big old ant crawling across the floor. Then another. Then another. I live on the second floor, so I'm not exactly sure where they are coming from, and I didn't have any last year. My housekeeping skills are not stellar, and the little buggers seemed quite excited by the smarties Naomi dropped on the floor a while back. I got my shoe, took care of the ants, disposed of the smarties, vacuumed, washed the floor, killed a few more and tried to figure out exactly where they were coming from. I still haven't found out yet. I had a couple of ant traps, so I put those down. Every day I am still finding a couple, but they show up in random places and they always seem to be alone: the counter, one on the stove, in the dishwasher, by the cat food bowl, and this morning I found one trapped in the sugar bowl, which scared the heck out of both of us.
The next step is removing everything from the pantry and wiping it down and putting it all back making sure that it's all properly sealed in containers and ziploc baggies. That, and maybe dumping a big pile of sugar in the back garden. Until they are willing to pay rent, they are not welcome. This is war....

A glorious weekend

Montreal had a little taste of summer for the Easter weekend. We were all shocked and overjoyed when the lovely meteorologists informed us that we would have temps over 20C for three days! Global warming, schmobal warming, this rocks! I did some work Friday, and then went with a friend to Rapids Park in the late afternoon and spent time there watching the water and enjoying the heat and the sun with the other happy people who were also there enjoying it with us.


This is an amazing time of year because city folk get so caught up in the promise of the summer that we end up walking around with smiles and temporary good will to our fellow Montrealers. This lasts until the traffic, heat, and crowds of the numerous festivals harden our hearts again.
Saturday started with a nice long run and then I had plans for fish pedicures with Libby and Melissa, but Libby got sick and stayed in Toronto. Melissa and I went and had a great time having some lunch, catching up, getting our feet nibbled, then groomed and polished, and then we each found a great little summer dress on St Denis.



The temp got up to 26C and the clothing was scanty on the Plateau. We came out from our pedis and even in our modest summer outfits had a sexy strut up St Laurent. Melissa was telling me that in Vancouver (she lived there for several years before returning), men don't stare because they tend to get ridiculed by the ultra-feminists. I'm so glad that is not true here. In Montreal, men know how to look at women, and for the most part the Plateau guys are less leery "how you doin?" and more intense momentary appreciation. I think it's harmless and it always gives me a little extra wiggle in the caboose. Later in the evening, I headed over to Verdun and hung out with Maggie and the family visiting for Easter supper. The vodka and tonic was flowing as we sat out in the back garden and then the kitchen.



Sunday started with another run, then I picked up the kids, got Nomi into her Easter dress, and we headed for the townships to see my folks for Easter and to celebrate my dad's birthday. It was warm and sunny again, so we were able to have an egg hunt outside. The kids ran all over the place, we ate, I even managed a short nap. We got home late, but the kids are off tomorrow, so we'll have a low key day and collect ourselves for the rest of the week.
There were so many reasons to love this weekend - I hope yours was amazing too :-)

From a tornado to a soft warm breeze, well, sort of.....

It's spring here, that means that the lovely sunny weather we have had has turned cold and grey, and it's time for a weather and progress report. The winter was cold at times, stormy, but also beautiful and clean. Things lay dormant and I focused on what was happening inside for a while. My long-term goal is to continue to become a happier person. How am I doing? What have I learned?
First of all, I'm way too uptight about stuff. That does have its good points, but I am learning that I've got to be a little less up in people's faces and that goes for me as well. Forcing the world into my square peg/round hole view is exhausting and futile. I'm trying to be more forgiving, more open, more understanding. Some days this is also exhausting, but when I succeed I feel better about what I'm doing and less frustrated with others and myself.
I've talked about my problem with hurrying before. What is my rush? I'm slowing down, letting some responsibilities go, resetting priorities. What's more important? Getting to work on time or stopping to look at something in the park on the walk across to the school? I'm also driving a little less like a lunatic and actually getting a chuckle by frustrating hurried drivers behind me. Hey, gotta have fun somewhere!
I'm taking the time to enjoy myself as well. More concerts, more evenings with friends, more conversations with colleagues, and so much more planned this year!
I am not succeeding to do this every day. Most of the time I realise that I'm being a tornado mid-whirl and try to repair my damage. When I am able to still myself I feel so good that I know I want to continue this work I'm doing. It's just taking a lot longer than the tornado part of me wants to accept.

Petting zoos a plenty

It's Easter, so every mall now has a petting zoo with all the basics: sheep, goats, llamas, ducks, piggies, bunnies, and chickens. The kids just love the animals, and the animals love the food from those little dispensers. Ben figured out that a whole bunch gets dropped, and he diligently picked up the pellets and fed them to the sheep - smart boy!

Steve took Naomi out with the playgroup to another mall on Wednesday, but Naomi was far more excited about the indoor play structure than the animals this time.

She's also discovered that climbing up slides is fun. She's been a bit hard on Steve lately; she's very busy and now seems to have a penchant for extreme toddler sports, like climbing on to the kitchen table and rolling off and jumping up and down on the toilet. Living with a small Knieval is tiring because it's a constant race to protect her from herself. Even when she falls she's not deterred. We are very happy that the weather is getting warmer and the park is now an option for running off some energy for both kids. They love the park more than they love us, and possibly more than their Uncle Scott, although that could be an exaggeration.