I did it!

(This post is way overdue, just finding some time now.)

At this moment I am so proud of myself. At the beginning of the year when I came up with the crazy idea of running a half marathon (originally for the end of April, which was postponed) I do not think that I really believed it could happen.

Running half that distance was a challenge for me, and my knees were not super thrilled, plus, let's face it, I'm not a young lady anymore and I'm athletically challenged at the best of times.

I pushed myself January-March. I had a training schedule to keep, but with my kids and work I was constantly out of time and trying to squeeze my workouts into impossible times when I should have been sleeping or doing something else that was important. I got stressed out and felt guilty about not keeping my goals, not spending enough time with kids and slipping behind at work. When I decided I wasn't ready in April and I gave myself permission to pass, two things happened: I regained my love of running, which had turned into a chore that I was starting to dread, and I became even more determined to do the 21k. I decided that I would train and run the distance late in the year. I saw the Oka run advertised and I knew it was meant to be and signed up right away.

I increased my distance gradually and didn't freak out when I had setbacks. I tried to stay as disciplined as possible, and I talked to everyone I know who runs for guidance and encouragement. I also let everyone know what I was doing so that I had a bit of guilt-support built into my routine. Sometimes your motivation on those bad days is knowing that your co-worker is going to ask you how that training is going. Some of my runs got longer, but when I could only squeeze in time for a 5k, I just did that because it was better than nothing.

In September I started running to the mountain, up the mountain, around the mountain, and back, 19k. I love this run. My favorite part is stopping at the lookout to admire the view, I feel so strong and accomplished. On Thanksgiving weekend I ran along the lake in Hamilton and when I got back and plotted my route, I realised that I had run 21k! Wow! After that weekend I took a week off in Maine and ran the 21 twice, as well as other shorter runs and hiking. I felt ready for Oka, nothing was gonna stop me, I had actually managed to plan and prepare for this, I was thrilled!
On Monday, the week before the race, I realised that I was getting a cold.
Shit.
I tried running it out of my system, but that didn't work. I worked from home most of the week and tried to rest and take vitamin c and all the stuff you should do. On Friday I went over to Adriana's and she worked her yoga magic on me with chest openers which cleared a lot of the junk in my lungs out.

That night I didn't sleep a lot, and at 5am I was up and getting ready. I packed everything just in case the weather changed. At 7 I was at the race site, the chalet was still relatively quiet. Within a half hour it was chaotic and crowded, so I was glad for my early arrival, even if it did mean some waiting around. I watched the sunrise over the water while I stretched and relaxed. A half an hour before the start time I went out to the start area and waited with all the other crazies. I found my friend Joanne and we jumped up and down trying to stay warm. It was freezing. By the time it started, the bottoms of my feet were frozen. It was good to finally start and the sun came out to warm us and melt the ice off the pavement.

I was at the back and stayed there for pretty much the entire way. I learned a few things. Runners are messy with the cups of water and throwing protein bar wrappers and tissues on the ground, they spit a lot, running clubs are way too cliquey - they move in little snobby packs, couples who run seem to stop a lot at the port-o-potties, and the really fast guys start late and run past you like you are standing still. The route was a go and double back sort of affair. The first guy passed me on his way back when I was at the 7k mark! That wasn't discouraging at all......

Most everyone else passed me around 9 or 10k which was fine. At some points I felt like I was running alone. There were a couple of people behind me, but not too many. The last couple of kilometers where I would normally feel a bit of extra energy I realised that I had nothing, probably because of being sick. All the way, the volunteers cheered us all on, it was so sweet. When I reached the finish, many cars were pulling out of the parking lot. My final time was 2:25, about 25 minutes after most people, but very respectable for me. I had my banana and bagel at the finish line and warmed up a bit at the chalet before heading home.

It was kind of anticlimactic. I'd been training for so long, now I'd done it and I was walking around feeling elated, but very alone at the same time.

I stopped at a friend's daughter's birthday party on the way home. My kids were there and many of my friends, and they all made a huge fuss over me and it was exactly what I needed, especially hugs from my two favorite people in the world. I ate like a pig and afterwards went home and got comfy on the sofa and iced my knees and tried not to move for the rest of the day. Sunday I went to yoga and once again Adriana fixed my body. On Monday I was perfectly fine.



So, the latest total (money is still coming in) is $1657 for the Children's Hospital and another $190 for the WIAHA. Thanks to everyone who donated :-)

I can't wait to do it again.

she's not from here - day 2

Slept in until 8! Woke to the sun on the leaves, making them glow bright red and yellow and orange against the deep blue sky.
And I believe to the sound of a passing logging truck.
Have been reading and writing and lounging all morning, but must get out at some point and wander about. Trying to determine if my knees will accept a hike up Grafton Notch, or whether they'd prefer a 10k run. I'm fairly certain they'd prefer to stay in bed.
So yesterday, I had my route, which started with a dreary run along the two-lane which the locals treat like the autobahn. No real shoulder to speak of, so pretty terrible. Finally get to the turn off, Vernon Street, which goes back, way back behind the pond and loops around to town. Paved, but very quiet. Too quiet in fact. Realised that there really wasn't much out there in terms of anything. My thoughts turned to city-girl fears - bears, serial killers, you know. On the other hand, I'm enjoying the peace and the woods all around and being the only thing on the road. To combat my fear of startling a bear (my brain is a truly stupid place), I started to sing whatever my ipod was playing, of course terribly because I'm running, I'm wearing headphones, and who can sing the Beegees and Abba? Was fully expecting to come upon a bunch of locals BBQing in their backyard and staring at me. Luckily, that didn't happen.
Passed the occasional house and bit of civilization. After about 12.5k I came to the next turnoff that I'd seen on the map. Paradise Road cuts directly into town instead of going further around and then back. This seemed more efficient to me as I'd sat at the house planning. It looked harmless, as all truly bad things do. There were quite a few houses along the route, although the road was narrow. I took it. It had started to rain, a light drizzle, it was a bit cool, windy.
I now have a new rule about checking elevations when I plan a running route.
Paradise Road got its name because its purpose seems to be to bring you to the kingdom of heaven. The grade started slowly for the first .5k, then turned into the equivalent of running up Peel Street ten times, in a now harder and cooler rain. At a few points I actually felt like I was moving backwards. I was rewarded at the top with a vantage of the mountains and surrounding colourful countryside and a cemetery with one headstone. There are a couple of houses up there and I was mighty jealous. The way down was much less steep and I made it into town in time for the sun to come out. I wandered a bit and then ran, stumbled, occasionally walked, the last 7k back to the house, iced my knees, went and found some food, had a hot bath, and read until I couldn't stay awake.
Out and about again!

True love

Ok, so it's midnight on Valentine's Day and I'm just getting around to this. V-day started early this morning when the kids climbed in for a snuggle. Ben wished me a Happy Valentine's day before he even got into bed. There's something so indescribably wonderful about having a conversation with cuddly children in bed on a lazy weekend morning. That was my V-day gift, and it was the best present ever. We got up and I made waffles and cut little hearts in them which amused everyone. Their dad came and got them a while later, leaving me the rest of the day to myself. It was cold today, but not frigid, so I got dressed up and prepared for a run. It's getting harder to get out there lately, and I've been trying not to feel bad about that. I hate the treadmill - it's convenient and warm, but so dull that I can only do about 6km before I die of boredom no matter what music I have playing. To have a proper run, I really have to be outside.
So out I went, not wanting to brave the elements, but in need of the thing that makes so much of my life better. I count on running now, it's become more than a friend to me. It brought me through a really tough time and continues to offer me peace and calm when nothing else can. If you had told me a few short years ago that I would be running 10km on a Sunday morning, I would have looked at you like you were insane, but now I do it with relative ease. I am not a fast runner, I get passed by the people in the fancy black running clothes like I'm standing still, but it's not about speed or time for me, it's about quiet and release, listening to my body and letting my mind go.
I am contemplating a half marathon in April if my schedule permits (my travel schedule may conflict with the race or interfere with my training time too drastically) to raise money for the Children's. I've never run that far and I am not into racing, but I think it may be time to challenge myself, and if I do, I want to do it for charity.
Running has given me so much mentally and physically, it is a love that came late but that I hope to hold on to for as long as I can. Someone told me recently that as women get older running actually becomes easier, that we have more endurance, or maybe more of a desire to embrace that silence and serenity in ourselves. When I came in after my run I felt alive and happy and proud and like I was lit from within. That's what love does to you :-)

D's knees

(image borrowed from: http://216.74.18.90/image/122/totalknee/images/Img%205%20Knee%20Anatomy.jpg)

I went to the physiotherapist today bracing myself for the worst. I expected that she would tell me to stop running for a while. This would kill me. Yes, I did go for a *tiny* run this morning just in case she said "no more". And I ran to the appointment... well, come on, I was wearing my running shoes!
Ok, ok, so she had a good look and made me do all sorts of bending and she poked and asked questions and prodded and asked me if that hurt, how about that? I think after a bit she was trying to get me to scream.
Good news! I had an alignment problem of my sacrum that was throwing everything off and ultimately causing my right knee to turn in. And my right butt muscle is weak. She made the adjustment and I have exercises to do. This is so much better than I'd hoped, so guess who will be doing her exercises? She also suggested that I tone down the mileage until I build up the muscle and she's sure that the alignment takes.
I think I can live with that :-)

knees and needs

I think that I need to do something about my knee. This week I have had some amazing runs. The weather's been sunny and cool, coming out of the house and taking off right away, enjoying the quiet, the leaves on the ground, the frost on the grass, the sun rising and the moon hanging in the sky. My mind clears, I let go of the things weighing on me, and I just go. I am light, I am at peace, and about 5km in, my right knee starts to nag. I'm disappointed in my knee, it should know better. It's not being a team player. The rest of my body is ready and willing and completely psyched for more, and that knee is wrecking our happy time. I am taking a break from running tomorrow and hoping that the knee will feel some guilt and get over itself. Barring that, I will stretch even more, take some Advil, and probably make an appointment with a physiotherapist to get some help so I can continue to do this. I figured out that if I don't run, a part of me explodes. This evening it's started to nag again a bit, it was fine apart from the stairs all day. I am concerned and a bit apprehensive for Saturday morning.
I have a lot of stuff whirling in my head, there a lot of ideas to be written down. The calm is still with me, with the occasional flare up. I needed a hug tonight. I had my kids and was busy getting things done and acting cheerful, but I needed a hug, it was on my mind. My daughter came into the kitchen and said, "hug, hug, hug!", and it was all I could do not to cry as she wrapped her arms around me.
It's ok, it's more than ok, I'm doing it.

Run around

Sometimes, despite my love of novelty, I have to accept that change is not a good thing.
I needed to replace my running shoes, badly. From everything that I know, you are supposed to change your runners every 500-800 kilometers, depending on how heavy a runner you are. I should have changed them in June, but June passed, then July, next thing you know the leaves are falling and I started getting twinges in my knees, my shins, my heel. I knew I was looking at an injury if I kept this up. Off to the running store! The guy looked at my old ones and brought out new ones that looked just like my old ones, and another brand.
Ooooo, another brand......
They were a different colour. They were lighter, they fit nicely and had more support in the arch. I ran back and forth around the store and decided that I would try them out and see. The first run with them the next day outside wasn't great. I had arch pain in my right foot for the first 3km. The next day it was for 2km, but after that I felt a twinge in my knee. I tried them for another 20km on treadmills and something about that right shoe just wasn't working out. I switched back to my old shoes and my arch stopped hurting, but the knee pain was still there, which isn't surprising considering the condition of my old shoes. I called the store and they told me to clean them up and bring them back. I did my best and I came home with a new pair of my old shoes. My first run on them was amazing!
Lesson learned: when you find something that works you just keep going with it, but if it's irritating the hell out of you from the beginning you should know that it's only gonna get worse.

My body

Perhaps in the spirit of getting back into the blog thing I should tell the one or two people who still wander through what's been going on for the past couple of years. We'll start with my body.
When Naomi turned one and I returned to work I was over 190lbs and pretty down about it. Now, I've never been skinny, but having kids and staying home for a year with each had really taken its toll. I was in nasty shape and fat as a house. A couple of months before, I got back in touch with my old friend Deb. We had lost touch when she and her boyfriend split. We invited her over for dinner one night, and when I opened the door to let her in, I took one look and said, "Cripe Deb, where did the rest of you go?". She had easily lost 30lbs and looked fab. She told me that she followed Weight Watchers. I remembered doing WW in my early twenties with a bunch of my friends and losing 10lbs. I also remembered how hard it was to keep track of the breads, milks, etc. After being reassured that it was not like this anymore, I signed up online for a trial free membership, downloaded all the info I needed to do it on my own, then cancelled and off I went. So that was two years ago. Since then, I've lost more than 50lbs and am down to a healthy weight.

I don't follow WW, but I eat reasonably and I continue to eat the normal, healthy food I have always eaten. Last year I returned to the gym and now I have a routine of 4 or 5 days a week. I started running, which now feels amazing because my knees don't hurt and I no longer feel winded. In short, I'm happier with my body than I've been in 10 years. My goal over the winter is to work with a personal trainer on my upper body and train for 10k.
I think my success is in part to do with the fact that I wasn't in a hurry and I never obsessed about the scale. When I reached a point where I wasn't steadily losing, I just kept doing what I was doing until my metabolism caught up. When it comes to your body, patience is the best thing you can give it, and a cute new pair of jeans of course...;-)