Monday, July 07, 2003

Last Thursday we received a call from the hospital confirming my scheduled c-section on July 28. This scared the hell out of us because we didn't schedule anything with the hospital. Turns out that my doctor decided to book it because he's 99.9% sure that I'm having a c-section. You have to love a doctor who gives you so little hope of avoiding having your midsection sliced open. He logically explained why he thought this, but that's not what I wanted to hear. I wanted some compassion from him, perhaps any sign that he actually realised how big a disappointment this was to me and how scared I am of the surgery. I didn't get it, which of course just made me mad, and stubborn. I talked him into trying to turn the baby, which will be attempted either the 14 or the 24. I got some advice from an experienced midwife, she made me feel hopeful. I talked to a female doctor and a nurse at the hospital who sympathised and told me there's still a good chance that the baby will turn of its own. The nurse did tell me that my doctor is one of the best at the hospital, even if he's not the most compassionate. This made me feel better, because I was starting to worry that I had chosen a c-section crazy man.
Needless to say that I'm still very down in the dumps about the whole thing, I'm trying to stay positive and relaxed, but it's difficult.

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