Sleepless

I've had the worst luck sleeping last week. Between Ben waking up at night and baby pumpkin keeping me awake with endless kicks and rolls, I haven't  really been able to sleep from 3am until at least 6:30. By Friday, I was fried. Perhaps this is good preparation for when the next baby arrives, but I had kind of hoped for a bit of a break. I have a distant memory of how I slept before Ben arrived. I was a deep sleeper, the kind of sleeper that falls off quickly and stays asleep all night. I rarely remembered my dreams and would wake up most mornings refreshed. What the heck happened? Ben turned me into someone with 'mom ears', the woman who can hear a small cough over a thunderstorm at incredible distances. Now, even when Ben doesn't wake up at night, I'm so programmed that I wake up anyway. I feel like Molly Bloom, laying awake with my brain running at 100 mph, and of course you know that the more that you think about trying to get back to sleep, the more impossible it becomes. You'd think that our bodies would evolve to deal with this sleep deprivation, but I only get stupider, which seems like the worst quality for someone caring for small children. Last night I slept a bit better than usual and it was bizarre waking up almost early. I was still late for work, but not half as bad as normal. I'm hoping for a repeat tonight - sweet dreams!