And in the end
Isn't it about becoming and being decent, intelligent and kind human beings who can make choices and be ultimately responsible* for the consequences of them?
Good choice of articles there Elizabeth, especially the one by Jennifer Foote.

*Responsible implies the ability to choose a response as in response able--as opposed to being a victim. Note that one uses the active voice whereas the other one usually implies having things inflicted on you and you therefore you are not response able....